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Temple Rants (4/22/2015): TRES! TRES! TRES!

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Welcome to the inaugural edition of Temple Rants, your weekly coverage of one of the most exciting wrestling shows on the planet, Lucha Underground!

My name is Anthony and I’ve been watching Lucha Underground since the start. I was initially drawn to it after hearing about former WWE guys I’d get to see again - Johnny Mundo/John Morrison and Chavo Guerrero - but Lucha Underground quickly distanced itself from your typical wrestling show. It’s raw. It’s gritty. It features a solid cast of characters - beloved fan favorite and handsome guy Johnny Mundo, the slimy, sleazy boss Dario Cueto, to the luchador hunter King Cuerno (is he a luchador that hunts, or is he someone who hunts luchadors?). All these elements combine to form a wrestling show that is different. I like it, and follow it because it provides a nice change of pace from the typical wrestling show. If you’re looking for something fresh, you’ve found it here in Lucha Underground.

Last week on Lucha Underground, we found out the third team who advanced to the finals of the Trios Championship Tournament: King Cuerno, Texano and Cage. We also got a preview of the upcoming title match as Cage, Mack and Son of Havoc faced off, with Cage picking up the win and the momentum. Sexy Star, meanwhile, interrupts Pentagon’s latest sacrifice, likely setting up a match for this week. We also got the thrilling conclusion of Aerostar and Drago’s best of five series, with Drago picking up the win. His prize? An LU Championship match—but if he loses, he’s banned from the Temple.

We start off with a Black Lotus segment – she’s been training for 8 weeks, but she doesn’t know when El Dragon Azteca will let her fight. Cut to a segment of Black Lotus fighting off four men under a nice silhouette effect, before facing off with Azteca. Black Lotus gets the upper hand, but Azteca counters and tells her she’s not ready.

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Look at that. Those Trios belts are just drippin’ swag.



The Trios belts look AMAZING. The actual belts themselves are red, with the plates having gold, black and red trimmings. The main plate is the trademark LU mask logo with a little bit of flair added and Trios Champion written at the bottom, and the sideplates having mask logos as well. That’s brilliant symbolism—it’s not only you who’s champion, but the two guys beside you as well.

Match 1: Sexy Star vs. Pentagon Jr.

Pentagon Jr. has continued to wreak havoc around the Temple, and his “sacrifices” continued with an attack on Melissa, the ring announcer. That didn’t sit well with Sexy Star, who came out for the save, setting up this match. We get a quick shot of Melissa’s ankle, and Striker plays up how she willed herself to come work even after being told to stay at home and rest. Nice way to build her character.

Dueling chants for the two competitors start off the match, and Pentagon Jr. takes early control with a pair of solid kicks to the guy. Sexy Star is showing some fight, though, and even goes for a pin, but Pentagon Jr. easily takes control again. He tries to lock in the dreaded ARMBAR, but Sexy Star senses the danger and is able to roll out.

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A day may come when Sexy Star falls to the armbar, but it is not this day.

Some more back and forth action, with Sexy Star hitting some nice high-flying spots. Pentagon Jr. catches her and hits a vicious lungblower! And another one! Another ARMBAR submission, and Sexy Star escapes. Just as Pentagon seems firmly in control, Sexy Star ends up on his back and drops him with a lungblower of her own! Pinfall – one, two, three!

Winner: Sexy Star!

That was quite the start! It’s very rare to see a man vs. woman match these days, but these two put on a good show. The finish might have been a bit too soon, especially right after Pentagon hit two lungblowers in a row, but I don’t think Pentagon looked weak in defeat. Pentagon seethes in the ring, and I don’t think we’ve seen the last of these two yet.

Meanwhile, Alberto El Patron walks in on Johnny Mundo working out, asking him if he’s preparing for the Trios title match–oh, wait, he lost last week. El Patron just mocks Mundo, telling him he’s always near the brass ring (heh), but it remains out of his grasp. Harsh. Mundo tells him to back off, and El Patron does, but not before telling him to chill out. Short, but sweet. Knowing what these two can do in the ring, that’ll be nothing short of special. I’m looking forward to that.

We go back to the ring, and it’s time for our title match!

Match 2: Lucha Underground Trios Championship Match – Texano/Cage/King Cuerno vs. Angelico/Son of Havoc/Ivelisse vs. Big Ryck/Mack/Killshot

King Cuerno just looks badass with that deer headgear. Our favourite dysfunctional trio comes out next, as Angelico, Son of Havoc and Ivelisse make their way through the crowd. Big Ryck, The Mack and Killshot come out last – have I mentioned how Big Ryck looks like a cigar-smoking, ripped Nick Fury? Yep, enjoy that image.

The team of Texano, Cage & Cuerno easily look like the favourites early on, successfully isolating members of the other two teams and picking them apart. We get a nice flapjack into a kick from Texano and Cuerno, but a distraction from Ivelisse allows Killshot & Angelico to finally make the tags. A bit of back & forth action until Texano/Cage/Cuerno dominate again, the highlight of which is a moonsault from Cage onto the rest of the guys outside the ring.

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As much as Cage is promoted as a powerhouse guy, he’s got the flippy genes in him.



That dominance is put to an abrupt end, though, as Angelico slams Texano into the front seats, causing a fan to get pissed off and attack Texano. Wait, no, that’s actually Shawn Daivari! The attack is enough to leave Texano dazed in the ring, and Killshot takes advantage of the distraction to hit his diving double foot stomp and pin Texano.

Texano, Cage and King Cuerno are eliminated!

Down to two teams, and once again Angelico plays the face in peril, taking a variety of offense from Big Ryck, Mack and Killshot. Killshot, in particular, has been impressive, hitting another lungblower (that’s the fourth one) and a VERY impressive slam on Son of Havoc. We get a nice spot of Son of Havoc coming in to save Ivelisse from Big Ryck & Mack. Angelico manages to sneak back in the ring, picks up Killshot, and hits Fall of the Angels! One, two, three! New champions!

Winners, and the FIRST Lucha Underground Trios Champions: Ivelisse, Angelico, and Son of Havoc!

Oh, wait, slimy Dario Cueto is out and he isn’t looking pleased. He congratulates them for winning the title–wait, Cueto says they haven’t. There’s one more team they haven’t faced. Cueto announces a no disqualification match, then brings out his guys...

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CHARLIE! ROMEO! ECHO! WHIS- Wait, no, that doesn’t seem right.


It’s The Crew! Mr. Cisco, Bael and Cortez Castro make their way down to the ring, and the new champions have to immediately defend their belts!

Match 3: Trios Championship Match – Angelico/Son of Havoc/Ivelisse vs. The Crew (Cortez Castro/Mr. Cisco/Bael)

The Crew immediately get the jump on Ivelisse, Son of Havoc and Angelico, taking immediate control. The two teams brawl all over the arena – Bael and Angelico up the stands, and the other four in and around the ring. Angelico is slammed on the office roof, and is out cold. Son of Havoc and Ivelisse try to fight back, with Son of Havoc launching himself onto Cisco from up the stands.

The Crew have the numbers advantage, though, and take control again, easily cornering the injured Ivelisse. And now – HOLY SHIT, ANGELICO!

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This shot doesn’t do it justice. Watch the actual thing. It’s THAT awesome.


Angelico just flew from the top of the office roof onto the Crew in the ring! WOW! Ivelisse takes the kendo stick and just slams the Crew with it! She’s calling for the kill! Son of Havoc and Angelico go up top! Shooting Star Press! Double Foot Stomp! One, two, three!

Winners, and the FIRST Lucha Underground Trios Champions (for real) – Angelico, Son of Havoc and Ivelisse!

Wow! The dysfunctional team are your first ever Trios Champions, as Son of Havoc, Ivelisse, and Angelico get the titles after two gruelling matches. We close the show with the champions celebrating in the ring, as the crowd gives them a “You deserve it!” chant.

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Well-deserved, indeed.



Great show for this week! Sexy Star and Pentagon gave us an unusual, but great intergender match, and I hope to see more of this in the future. The elimination tag match was solid, and had some great moments. Keep Killshot on your radars – that guy is insane and can go in the ring. Alberto El Patron looks to be setting up a feud with Johnny Mundo, which means we’re in for some brilliant wrestling. Then there’s Daivari, the latest in a long line of familiar faces to visit the Temple, and from the looks of it we’ll be seeing him again. And of course, your new Trios Champions – a well-deserved win for Angelico, Son of Havoc and Ivelisse, and I’m interested to see how they’ll keep that tension between them while defending their newly won belts.

Next week, Drago gets his prize as he fights Prince Puma for the World Title! Will we see a new champion, or will Drago pack his bags and say goodbye? Tune in to next week's show to find out!

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