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SmackDown RunDown (6/30/16): On Ribcages and Sandwiches


You want a bite? Thursday night came and went, which means it’s time for another edition of SmackDown RunDown with your resident shy boy, Ricky. This week, we got a returning champion, an exciting opener, and some dude eating a sandwich. Is your interest piqued already? Alright, let’s get down to it.

The Bulgarian Brute Cut The Uppercut Party Short



This week opened with an exciting Fatal 4-way match to determine who will face Rusev for the United States title in the same night. This was certainly out of nowhere and I like it. Cesaro faced Alberto del Rio, Sheamus, and Apollo Crews, and boy, what a match they had. It wasn’t as good as the Intercontinental Fatal 4-way from this year’s Extreme Rules, but still, it was a fun way to open the show. The match started like a WWE 2K16 simulation, but it caught up pretty quickly. Cesaro was clearly the star of the night. The final sequence saw Cesaro swing ADR and quickly applied the Sharpshooter for the win. You rarely see ADR tap, making this victory as legit as it can get. Why is Cesaro not doing this more often?



After the match, a frustrated Del Rio attacked Cesaro and injured the latter’s ribs via the Double Stomp. Rusev then came out and demanded the title match start immediately. That was a great dick move by Rusev. Cesaro was reluctant but after Rusev called him a coward, Cesaro went back to the ring and started the bout. Despite being kayfabe injured, the title match was still good. Good storytelling from these two. Rusev obviously gained the victory by applying the Accolade to the injured ribs of Cesaro. It kinda sucks that after this great story they told, we’re just going back next week on RAW to another Rusev vs Titus match. Urgh.



The Lunatic Champion Welcomes The Miz

Fresh off from filming the 34th installment of the Marine, The Miz had a rough schedule this week. He faced Kane on Monday, and on SmackDown, he got to face WWE Champion Dean Ambrose in a champion vs. champion exhibition match, which we all know doesn’t bode well for the lesser champ. This all started in a MizTV segment when Dean Ambrose ruined The Miz’s suit by wiping some mustard off his face with it. What’s up with Dean’s obsession of ruining expensive pieces of clothing?



Anyway, the main event came and both men had a good match. Fun back and forth between the two, with Ambrose using an RKO-like move at one point. If you really want to get someone over, The Miz is the guy you can trust. Ultimately, Ambrose proved he’s on The Miz’s level with his hard-fought victory over Mike. This is how you build up a champion. So far, his run as WWE champion has been good. No complaints here.



Some Blue Brand Blues


  • This week saw another solid promo between The Wyatts and The New Day. After beating some random guys, the team of Rowan and Strowman (where the hell is Luke Harper?) stood behind their charismatic leader as the New Day spoofed the family again on the Titantron. Bray laughed with the jokes and then focused his attention to the terrified Woods (hehehehe). This rivalry is really intriguing me and I hope next week we’ll finally see who will strike first.

  • Women’s wrestling didn’t suck that much this week. The pseudo-main event this week featured The Boss vs Summer Rae in a match that surprisingly wasn’t the squash I was expecting. Both women got some great offense in. Sasha Banks eventually grabbed the convincing victory after making Summer tap out to the Bank Statement. Please someone draft her to SmackDown.

  • This week also saw the debut of Billie Kay, the newest member of the women’s main roster. It was a losing effort though, with Dana Brooke nailing her with a vicious Falcon Arrow. It wasn’t a bad debut for Billie Kay though. She wasn’t crushed so easily and it’s nice to see some fresh faces on the roster. Now we have, like, seven active members in the Women’s division. Hooray!

  • P.S. Fuck off, Otunga.

SMACKDOWN RUNDOWN: The Blue Brand is killing it for the second week in a row. The fatal four-way and the champ vs. champ matches were obviously the highlights of the show. Seeing Sasha make someone tap is also a great addition to the show. SmackDown is definitely ready to take over, or maybe this is just me overhyping again. Anyway, this week’s episode deserves another A.

Did you enjoy this week’s SmackDown? Were you expecting the gift of Jericho this week? Sound off your comments below.


*****


Ricky Jay Publico is a wrestling fan who enjoys watching high flyers and brawlers battle it out in the ring. A known Botchamania binge-watcher, he claims to have memorized the chronological order of Royal Rumble winners, but fails to remember who won in 2004. He writes stories about life and nonsense.

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