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SmackDown RunDown Live (3/21/17): Some Southpaw Vibes


How’s it going, bros? My name’s Pew...sh*t, wrong intro. What’s up, smarky people? It’s another edition of SmackDown RunDown Live! This week’ a fun one as we witnessed a much-anticipated title change and two disgruntled commentators from the 80s slugging it out. Let’s get down to it.

The CeNikki-Maryz rivalry went straight down South(paw)



This week was a fun one for the battle of power couples. Miz and Maryse unleashed their comedic chops to parodize Total Bellas in a series of so-bad-it's-good skits. Miz was great as the controlling Cena while Maryse was hilarious in her spot-on Nikki Bella impression. I gave Maryse a hard time last week for speaking too much, but after watching these Total Bullsh*t segments, I kinda want to take my words back. The segments had some campy and corny vibe to it, it had me thinking the guys who wrote Southpaw Regional Wrestling were behind the whole thing. Lovely work from the A-list couple. They should do at least two more next week before they finally collide at WrestleMania.



Speaking of Southpaw, the dude that looks like Lance Catamaran went to battle with the dude who looks like Chett Chetterfield. For those who haven’t seen the short mini-series, this week’s match-up may have confused the hell out of them. It wasn’t really a match though, Cena quickly dispensed Fandango with an STF. Surprisingly, Fandango got to cut a nice promo before the start of the match, as she introduced Breezy Bella (you don’t need to know). Nikki Bella disposed of her imposter as well. It was still a fun segment. I don’t mind these kinds of segments from time to time, really.

The Usos placed the tag team division back on the map



SmackDown Live featured another great match that should’ve gotten the main event treatment. Considering that this was a SmackDown Tag Team Championship match and they still owe us a lot for sidelining them a couple of weeks back, this match should’ve gotten the spotlight it clearly deserves. It’s also weird to think that their non-title match last week got the main event spot while the Usos’ coronation night was bumped to the opening match in favor of another lacklustre AJ Styles-Shane McMahon segment. That would’ve made this moment more impactful than it already did.



Nonetheless, this match was one of the best tag matches on SmackDown Live  to date. It was an action-packed affair with lots of exciting nearfalls and innovative teamwork. Despite the support they received during the entire match, the Usos stayed true to their characters by winning the tag titles through ball-wrenching means. This is exactly what the Blue Brand’s tag team division desperately needs. I’d take these brash twins over the bland wrestling jocks any day. I can’t wait for WrestleMania when the twin brothers face off against another certain sibling team...if the rumors are to be believed. 


Some Blue Brand Vibes and Blues—Live!

Blue: Oh well. All I can do is shrug and witness how the Styles vs Shane storyline is progressing. No more rants from me, thank you very much. Have fun watching this trainwreck of a match come WrestleMania. Why was their segment the final segment of the night, anyway? As impressive as it was, Shane barely touched Styles with the Leap of Faith elbow. Not really something that will spark my interest. If you’re hyped for this match, you’re a good person and I envy you.


Blue: Bray Wyatt just became the most powerful man on SmackDown Live right now. He can manipulate the entire locker room to wear sheep masks and beat up Randy Orton. Why did he need a Family in the first place when he can just summon many dudes to do his bidding? Bray should’ve been the champion a long time ago! Kidding aside, the entire backstage segment was terrible. The song totally ruined it for me. Why would he even sing that? Who’s got the whole world in his hands? Is it Orton? Is it Wyatt, because he’s the champ? Was John Cena around during that segment? I don’t know! Stop f*cking up the main storyline, damnit!


Vibe: Baron Corbin lost to Randy Orton this week via a Dean Ambrose distraction and I guess that’s fine. While their match wasn’t a showstopper, it fulfilled its purpose of setting up Ambrose vs Corbin at WrestleMania while giving Orton some momentum. Not much to complain here. The way Corbin took the RKO was beautiful. I will miss the multi-man ladder match, though.


Vibe: The women of SmackDown Live were given a small portion of the show so they can get their finishers in, but they still made it work somehow. At least they weren’t completely sidelined this week. Somehow, this was the only storyline that hasn’t gone off rails yet. They have one more week to build this up and they better not screw that one up.


SMACKDOWN RUNDOWN: At least, SmackDown Live managed to redeem themselves from last week’s crapfest of a show. This week, the Blue Brand managed to revive the tag team division back to life and made us care for what is essentially an elaborate wedding proposal at WrestleMania. Still, I can’t help but feel disappointed how they are progressing the main storylines now that the Wyatt-Orton rivalry has reached a new level of WTF am I watching. So for their minor improvements alone, this week’s show deserves a B. I really miss giving SmackDown Live the top grade.


Did you enjoy this week’s SmackDown Live? What’s your favorite Cena house rule? Compute your net income down at the comments.

*****


Ricky Jay Publico (@HarambeMustLive) is a wrestling fan who enjoys watching high flyers and brawlers battle it out in the ring. A known Botchamania binge-watcher, he claims to have memorized the chronological order of Royal Rumble winners, but fails to remember who won in 2004. He writes stories about life and nonsense.

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